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Will you be my President?

Posted by Miss Knotty on February 20, 2006

I’ve decided that today shall have ‘Non-Sequitur’ all over it. I’m going to wish EVERYONE a Happy President’s day, and ask if people have a President, and give chocolate in honor of President’s Day. I wish I had had the foresight to print out little President’s Day’-tines to give out. I mean, President’s Day has it kind of rough. It comes right on the wake of V-Day, and all the celebration revolves around mattress and Department stores having sales. No one wishes anyone a happy President’s Day, or a Wonderful President’s Day Season, or anything. It’s just a day off for the Banks, the Courts and the Post Office. I vote that V-Day can die out entirely (it’s not a real holiday anyway, ask the banks, the courts and the Post Office. It’s totally fake. A farce generated by H@llm@rk and Flowers-To-Die), and that President’s Day become an actual holiday.

Imagine it: people can give Flag-styled chocolate, and flag-inspired flower-bouquets, and ask people to be their President, and send President-tines, and remember fondly our Founding Fathers, who made all this sentiment possible. I mean, I know NOONE who sends President’s Day cards, and most people don’t even actually get the day off. It’s just a day on the calendar with a lot of mattress and department store sales. Conversely, noone gets v-day off (unless it’s a vacation day) and everything is open, and corporate America is dictating to our men that they’re somehow failures if they don’t recognize that February 14 is the most important day on a lady’s calendar. I should mention that February 14 is a very important day to a lady. Without it, February would only be 27 days on non-leap years, and that would totally mess with the calendar people. It falls on the list just after a lady’s birthday, the anniversary of your meeting, the anniversary of your first date, the anniversary of the day you got engaged (if that’s actually happened – it hasn’t happened to me), your wedding anniversary (if this has actually happened – it hasn’t happened to me), family birthdays, Bosses Day, Secretary’s Day, Groundhog Day, the Fourth of July, The anniversary of President Kennedy’s Assassination (November 22), Beltane (if you follow that – I don’t), Solstice (again, if you follow that. I don’t), Samhaine (If you follow that – I don’t), and just about every other day on the calendar. February 14 should really just be February 14. I believe that this is St. Valentine’s Day, which should only matter if you’re Catholic and celebrate Saint’s Days – I don’t. Come to think of it, a LOT of Catholics don’t celebrate Saint’s Days, either (unless it’s the Saint of their namesake, and even then – not so much).

So go away, Valentine’s Day. Go away false sentiment. I’d give up a thousand Valentine’s Day grand gestures for one small gesture that meant a fella was actually thinking about me and made/bought/wrote something for me just to make me smile, with no hope or expectation beyond that it would make me smile.

Love and kisses,
-a spinster on a hill – (Rather, in a 3rd floor apartment.)


One Response to “Will you be my President?”

  1. Rebecca said

    sooooooo not gonna happen chica. Sorry. hope you’re having a absolutely fabulous President’s Day!!

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