Knot Watt Ewe Think

Knitting, Spinning, Movies, the InterWebs, and whatever else I turn my mind to…. but mostly knitting.

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New blog; new times, new stuff.

Posted by Miss Knotty on October 3, 2005

Hello there. I’m Regina. Welcome to my little corner of the Web. What do you think will happen here? A neat show, a trick? An insight into my inscrutable and yet irresistible personality? Or maybe not. Maybe it’ll just be funny, or random ramblings of a mind quickly going to waste. Or maybe not.

I don’t know, to be perfectly honest. I’m in flux myself. I think maybe if you’re thinking about what you might find here, you’ll probably realize after a read that it’s knot watt ewe think. If you did think anything.

Heck, I do, most of the time.

So what am I looking for in this experience, I wonder? People have this addiction to putting their whole lives on the web. I’ve seen it. People have blogs everywhere; I myself have had 4; One on a friend’s site (until I got put out with the program she was using b/c it lost my stuff), one on Myspace.com, one on my Yahoo 360 page; which I probably won’t be writing in, b/c Yahoo!’s software is as sub-par as some other places I’ve written.

I’ve been thinking though, and I do a lot of journaling off the web. A lot. I mean, I have 2 journals; one by my bed, and one that I carry around to do my bible study & take to church with me. And I write a lot of things in both; my general impressions of things around me, verses I want to go back and read again and again, what my impressions of those are as I progress in life and my paradigms change, just things that make me go hmmmmmmmm… In the diary I write things I couldn’t put on the web; private frustrations, things about my friends that I’m thinking or concerned about (that I would never ever tell them), things I would tell them, things I’m analyzing about myself and things I’d like to change, if I had it to do again (which I don’t have it to do again but one can dream sometimes). I read that good judgment comes from experience and experience comes from bad judgment. I’ve used my own and several other peoples’ share of bad judgment. I hope I can curb that impulse in the future.

I have some hopes for this blog; one, that it’ll let me post pics of my knitting projects (except that I have to figure out the digital camera problem (I don’t have one)); that it’ll let me vent sometimes, and think out loud, and that I can entertain myself with my own random thoughts that don’t make it into the other two chronicles of my life (as if I could presume to be important enough to have my life chronicled).

______ And now for something kinda different ________ but not really very different_______

Life, I find, often throws one for a loop. When you think you’ve got things figured out, when you think you’ve got it on the ball, the Lord has this way of showing up and reminding you that you’re not the one in control. I have to keep reminding myself of that. I am not in control. I have very little control, even of my own surroundings and behavior (sometimes). I mean, I have control of my reactions to things, but sometimes you can’t even say you have control of those. It can be frustrating. I know for a fact that I have to really keep my own counsel and think things through before I blurt them out. I’m an incorrigible blurter. I’ve been really working on holding my tongue and not interrupting, but sometimes I can’t seem to stop myself from speaking out of turn. I’ve tried a number of things for it; counting to 10 before I speak, really listening, to make sure that my response is what they’re looking for (and not just someone to listen), not speaking at all, telling someone that I can’t respond at the moment, that I need to think on it for a while and I’ll get back to them (which hasn’t really worked very well thus far, although it did keep me out of buying a really expensive couch that I would have later regretted), even just closing my eyes and counting to 3, but I still can’t seem to curb this verbal diarrhea thing I’ve got going on. I used to be able to make it stop; to just close my mouth and stare and be quiet, but I can’t seem to do that anymore. I need to get back to where I could, because people seemed to like me more when I didn’t have an instant (and usually not right) answer ready for them.

So that’s my goal for this week; to not speak out of turn; to make sure that the response I’m giving is appropriate to the circumstance.

Oh, and I need to lose a pound; two if possible.

-R

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